OAR - Print Resources

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When You and the Alcoholic Are Speaking Different Languages —

"You probably don't realize that you and the alcoholic are speaking two different languages....To the alcoholic, alcohol is not the problem, it's the solution. The problem is anybody or anything that gets in the way of his consumption of alcohol. You're talking about alcohol as the problem; he's talking about you as the problem. See the problem?"

Love First, p. 8

Doctor, Alcoholic, Addict

And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation - some fact of my life-unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.

AA Big Book, 3rd Ed. p. 449

Recommended Reading & Viewing

The journey out of addiction and into recovery is not easy. It takes work. One of the keys to finding hope and success is in equipping yourself for the road ahead. Below you will find a variety of print and media resources that can help you in your pursuit of healing.

On DVD

ADDICTION - Why can't they just stop? An HBO 14-Part Series. Several of the nation's leading experts on drug and alcohol addiction, together with a group of accomplished filmmakers, have assembled to create ADDICTION, an unprecedented documentary aimed at helping Americans understand addiction as treatable brain disease. Visit HBO.com/addiction to watch an excerpt.
Forever Changed - A true story that may SAVE YOUR LIFE. Did you ever tell yourself that you were fine to drive after drinking and that accidents only happened to "other people"? Tom Melin referred to himself as a professional drunk driver. He began driving under the influence of alcohol at the age of 16 and never thought twice about the consequences until his life was forever changed. To watch an excerpt, visit foreverchangedllc.com.

To learn about the basics of addiction:

Willpower's Not Enough - Recovering from Addictions of Every Kind, by Arnold Washton and Donna Boundy
The Recovery Book, by Al J. Mooney, M.D., Arlene Eisenberg and Howard Eisenberg.

Twelve-Step Resources:

Alcoholics Anonymous - Big Book. The story of how many thousands of men and women have recovered from alcoholism. If you would like to read it on-line click here.
Twenty-Four Hours A Day. Features an inspirational thought, meditation, and prayer for each day of the year, Twenty-Four Hours A Day offers you encouragement, support, and wisdom to help you continue your path to spiritual and personal growth.
Twelve Step Sponsorship - How it works, by Hamilton B. A practical guide to the basics of sponsorship to include both finding a sponsor and becoming a sponsor. An easy to read step-by-step presentation.

Resources for family members:

Love First - A New Approach to Intervention for Alcoholism & Drug Addiction, by Jeff and Debra Jay. This book is easy to read and is filled with valuable information about addiction in general, codependency, and practical steps for helping your addicted loved one.
Reclaim Your Family from Addiction - How Couples and Families Recover Love and Meaning, by Craig Nakken. This book explains how the addiction process moves through the entire family and shows us a path a family can follow to move into recovery.
Boundaries - When to say YES, when to say NO, to take control of your life, by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. In this book, Cloud and Townsend look at how to create healthy boundaries in the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual areas of our life.
One Day at a Time in Al-Anon. A full year of short daily readings for family members or friends with addicted loved ones.
Straight Talk - What Recovering Parents Should Tell Their Kids About Drugs and Alcohol, by Claudia Black.

Spiritual Resources:

A Hunger for Healing - The Twelve Steps as a Classic Model for Christian Spiritual Growth, by J. Keith Miller. This an easy to follow plan for moving through the twelve steps. A companion workbook is also available.
The Lies We Believe- The #1 Cause of Our Unhappiness, by Dr. Chris Thurman. Discover how to identify the common lies we believe about ourselves and how to move past them.
The Life Recovery Bible, published by Tyndale. Features the New Living Translation of the Bible and includes recovery profiles, twelve step devotionals, and recovery principles found in the scriptures.
The Healing Path - How the hurts in your past can lead you to a more abundant life, by Dan Allender. None of us escape the heartache and disappointments of life. To live is to hurt, and we all have the wounds to prove it. Regardless of how we've been hurt, we all face a common question: What should we do with our pain?
I Can't be an Addict, I'm a Christian, by Melinda Fish. A great resource explaining addiction in broad terms. It's no longer in print, but copies are available from numerous book distributors on the web.